The end of the road...

The darkness is swallowing my soul…it's all so dark around me…what's left to do, what's left to say? The light that burned inside of me that led me the way…it's exstinguished…

Is there any good reason why I should stay and why I should keep struggeling? Honestly, I can't think of any good reason, I even feel like I want to find the ultimate reason to end all of this… I am so fucking tired to feel the way I feel…

And yet I'm still hear, writing this down as an obituary to the posterity…

Or is it something else? Think, think…the hell that I built in my own mind with too much thinking…I can't bear this anymore, I need someone to save me, I am so exhausted…

Death, sweet promising death…to stop to excist, to stop to think…I'm longing for it!

Whenever I enter a plane, I hope it will crash…whenever I cross a street, I hope I'll be hit by a car…whenever I am near a train, I hope I'll be run over by it…That's not normal anymore…

Who will end my suffer? And when, when? I just can't take it any longer…Please, let me die…have mercy with me and let me die and end my suffer…because I am no longer able to fight!